I had a conversation with Erin and in true Erin form, she pointed out some pretty harsh realizations. The first realization is that I don’t have to be so stinking nice to everyone. I don’t have to solve all the problems of the world.
First reaction was “what? I don’t have to take care of everyone?”. What if someone won’t like me? Erin not so gently pointed out that it’s not personal, it’s not about me. That sometimes I have to say F*ck You.
I then read a book, Honeymoon With My Brother, and on page 100 it says this:
I didn’t do that fight makeup stuff well. Neither did he. Both of us had a serious case of conflict avoidance. Armchair pyschologists would say that’s because our parents had one of those old-fashioned, Dad-says/Mom-agrees (or at least humors him) relationships. Maybe. All I know is that when either of us heard a raised voice, we’d want to escape. I thought about the times my flight from fight reflex had postponed resolutations to my problems.
Was he talking about me? Sounded like it.
I’m taking a new position with recruiting in my business. I’m taking the THIS IS WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR position. No more holding hands, begging someone to take a look, waiting for responses forever. No more letting someone tell me I don’t have a real job.
Now let’s put that in positive speak.
I’m looking for someone who wants to create multiple streams of income. I’m looking for someone with a positive, can-do attitude and is willing to work smart. I’m looking for someone who can make their own decisions. Is that you?
picture courtesy of aimee at flickr.com